Category: Musings

Need to catch up? I Got One-Starred by a Customer: Part I

Everyone Needs a Break Sometimes

Once or twice a year, my husband and I take an international trip. During these trips and these trips only, I do not read work emails. I know that’s shocking nowadays. But look, I work in sales. That means checking my work email multiple times a day, every single day, all year long. I am at the store on Christmas Eve; I work the Friday after Thanksgiving. It’s not out of the ordinary to get texts from customers at 10 p.m. on a Sunday night. I love what I do, so this is not a complaint. But everyone needs a break once in a while. In the four years I’d worked at Zadok Jewelers before this trip to Colombia, my unplugging during international trips had never been a problem.

I Got One-Starred, but First, a Threat!

My husband and I had an amazing two weeks in Colombia. I came back to work relaxed and refreshed, ready to dive back into things. I sat down that morning, opened my email, scrolled to the bottom to start answering them in order, and saw this:

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He’d sent it while we were on the plane from Houston to Bogotá, just a few hours after I’d officially unplugged for the trip. I don’t think I have ever felt so taken aback in my entire life. I was absolutely gobsmacked and just sat there, blinking. Then, the part about leaving bad reviews sank in and my heart dropped down to my stomach. Panicked, I immediately went to Google. There it was, the customer rant to end all rants:

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Tears began streaming down my face. This person was clearly trying to damage not just the store’s reputation, but mine. Horrified by how angry he sounded and still in shock, I began to fear for my job and my career. His repetition of my full name was genuinely bizarre and made it pretty clear that his goal was to cause me personal suffering.

But most of all, as I read the rant over and over again, I was disturbed by the fact that every single claim this man made was a bald-faced lie. (Well, he did come and pick up his mom’s ring, but he didn’t ask for a manager like he said he would in his email.) I checked Yelp and found nothing, then went to Facebook and found the same review copy-pasted there. Months later, I’d find it on Wedding Wire as well. I decided to forward our entire months-long email chain to the higher-ups at work, informing them about the review and telling them it was completely false. Why delay my fate? I preferred that they find out about it directly from me.

An accurate depiction of me trying to cry discreetly at work that day. via GIPHY

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As I sat at my desk feeling like absolute garbage, our digital marketing and PR person came upstairs, right on cue. She had, of course, received notifications about the review. He had published them all the night before I came back to work. I suspect he read my out-of-office message and planned it that way so I’d have a nice surprise upon my return.

She told me immediately that she knew the review was bullshit as soon as she read it, that I would never do that, that this customer was clearly angry about something that had nothing to do with me. The Zadoks, I found out later, were also immediately certain that it was completely false. No one doubted me for a second, which I will always feel grateful for, and proud of. All of this was all somewhat reassuring, but didn’t solve the problem at hand.

The Customer is Always Right (At Least Online)

Turns out there’s not a damn thing a business can do to remove negative online reviews on sites like Google and Yelp, even when you have written proof they’re full of lies. Lying and repeating someone’s full name do not constitute abuse, so flagging did nothing. All a business can do is type a response. The store opted to type a generic “please-get-in-touch-with-us-about-this” response, which in my mind only validates what he wrote in the eyes of anyone reading it. He made some really specific claims that will probably seem believable to anyone who doesn’t know the whole story. I would have handled it differently, but it was not my decision to make. They didn’t want to poke the bear, so to speak. He did get in touch, but was not, how shall I say, receptive.

So that’s that. With the passage of time, algorithms and new reviews have pushed it lower and lower. But it will always be there, floating around online for anyone to see. In Canada or Australia it seems I’d have a firm legal case for libel, but here in the U.S. I’d have to prove actual damages, which I have no way of doing. Someone would have to refuse to work with me because of reading the review. To my knowledge that hasn’t happened, and I hope it never will.

Now What?

I’ve checked my work email excessively since I got one-starred by a customer. More than is necessary or healthy, as if I were the founder of a tech startup about to go public. When my husband and I moved back to the U.S. and re-entered this work-obsessed culture, I promised myself I would never become this person. And I wasn’t this person until I got one-starred. I hate it. I don’t have the inflated sense of self-importance that causes one to feel warm and fuzzy about checking their work email right before turning out the light to go to sleep.

My husband and I are going to France soon, a dream trip we’ve been planning since last July. I’ve debated with myself about unplugging. What if something bad happens again? But really, what could I have done from Colombia? Forward the threatening email to my co-worker and spent the rest of my vacation distracted, freaking out about an irrationally angry customer, checking Google and Yelp every day ? I’m so glad I didn’t spend my trip that way and was instead present in the moment, enjoying time with friends and family we see maybe once a year, if that.

Do you know what the funny thing is? My engagement ring, which I absolutely adore, cost the same amount as this guy’s final budget. His real final budget, not the one he said he had in his review. I know there’s nothing I did to fuel his rage. Maybe one day he’ll find peace with whatever demons caused him to act out in this way. Me? I just want to eat some croissants and guzzle champagne in peace. Here’s hoping.

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Want to see what I did in Colombia?

Jewels Around the World: The Emerald District in Bogotá, Colombia

Jewels Around the World: Shopping for Emeralds in Cartagena, Colombia

I got one-starred by a customer! What do I mean when I say that? It means a customer wrote an online review about where I work, and more specifically, about me, leaving a one-star rating. Want to know why a lot of businesses loathe online reviews? Because of BS like what you’re about to read! Pour yourself a stiff drink on my behalf and enjoy.

Everything Seemed Normal at First

On June 9, 2018, I was working the sales floor at Zadok Jewelers on a Saturday and helped a young man who was looking for an engagement ring. It seemed like a perfectly normal encounter, and he was friendly and polite. The following Monday, as is my custom, I sent him an appointment recap with information, photos and pricing on the rings and diamonds we looked at in store.

He did not respond, so six days later I followed up, and reminded him we were still holding his mother’s ring that he wanted to trade in toward his purchase.

What followed was a fairly standard exchange about pricing for different settings and diamonds. I got him all of the information he requested. He responded a week later and mentioned that since he was going to buy a house, his budget had changed. I answered him on my day off and said I heard him loud and clear, and that I’d send him some alternatives the next day, which I did. Then there was back and forth about payment options, financing information and the like. He stopped responding.

via GIPHY This is the sort of reaction I always aim for!

Things Start Getting Weird

One month and three days later, now in early August, he wrote to me apologizing for his delay in getting back to me. He said that he needed to lower his budget more. This happens a lot. Life happens, customers drop off, budgets change— no big deal! I wrote back said no problem; I work on the customer’s timeline. Then, I asked if he was open to different ring styles from what we’d looked at before, since with the new budget I was more limited with what I could find him.

(If all of these details seem excessive, just keep reading. You’ll understand later).

Two weeks later, he responded asking if I’d had time to look into more options. I asked him a second time if he was open to other styles. He said yes on a Thursday. Four days later, on Monday, I apologized for the delay in getting back to him and sent over photos and pricing for different styles. (Four days, even when two of those days are days off of work for me, is not a quick response time in my mind, hence the apology.)

He responded and said the options looked great, and that he was ready to spend $X. The only problem was that $X was a much lower budget than we’d last discussed, a four digit difference in fact. I felt a little perplexed by him presenting me with a new budget as if it hadn’t changed. Now, it would be difficult to find him any ring at all.

I Thought We Were Done?

At this point, I’d spent almost three months emailing back and forth with someone who never got past the initial investigation phase of ring buying. He hadn’t returned to the store once since his first visit and his communication had been erratic. I gently explained that I wasn’t seeing any diamonds in the carat range he wanted that would keep him in budget, but that I hadn’t factored in the trade-in item yet. In hindsight, that was a mistake. I was tiptoeing around the issue, and with the ambiguous comment about the trade-in item I wasn’t direct enough in saying that I could not get him what he wanted at his budget, period. Irony alert: I specifically remember not wanting to say anything that could be interpreted as the slightest bit blunt or snobby because I feared a bad online review. His reply: “Ok, thank you.”

I thought that it was over, that “Ok, thank you” meant “Ok, thanks anyway.” That was the end of our communication. Sometimes, it just doesn’t work out, and that’s okay. Except that it wasn’t. He would one-star me, and I had no idea.

Can I Live? Spoiler Alert: No

Six days later, I was on a late-night flight to Bogotá, Colombia, excited to travel around Colombia visiting my husband’s family and friends for two weeks. I had contacted all of the customers with whom I was actively working to let them know that I would be gone. I left detailed instructions with my co-worker, who would help them in my absence. My out-of-office email message had his information as well, along with the statement that I would answer all emails in the order in which they were received upon my return. If anyone needed help before then, all was taken care of.

via GIPHY An accurate depiction of our excitement level when leaving for Colombia.

I didn’t contact the customer with whom I’d emailed back and forth with for so long before leaving. If I made any other mistakes, I guess this was mistake #2. But we hadn’t actually accomplished anything together, and if he had written to me, we’d have to start from scratch yet again. I honestly thought he was done with me and the store.

Spoiler alert: he wasn’t. The shit was about to hit the fan, and I was leaving on a jet plane, none the wiser.

To be continued…